Christmas 2021

To be perfectly honest, I was really not feeling Christmas-y at all this year.

channeling my inner David Rose

However, we had family at our house for a week and it's hard to be grinchy when you're around your little niece and nephew at Christmas time! We read books, played, made lots of cookies, decorated gingerbread houses, and fed the birds and squirrels who visit our deck daily. Seeing Christmas through their eyes was pretty great and I'm so grateful for all of the time we were able to spend together! In addition to my mom, B1, B2, S1, S2, our niece, and our nephew, S2's parents came over and spent Christmas Day with us, which was so nice! We love them and consider them our family, too!

B2 and S2 brought their two dogs with them, and I loved having Max and Kaz here. You may recall that B2 was living with us when he adopted Max in 2010, and Max grew up with our Dachshunds and he and Ginny had an insanely loving relationship. This led to the saddest moment from Christmas week was when B2 and Max arrived; this was Max's first visit back to our house since Ginny died. As soon as he got in the house, Max frantically ran around looking for Ginny and sniffed every surface imaginable in his search. I kept telling him, "She's not here, Max," and after a while, I think he realized the truth. He ultimately climbed up into a chair, dug up the cushion, and curled up alone. It was absolutely heartbreaking to witness. He was sad, but he also seemed to sense how sad we were, because he spent much of the week sitting beside us and resting his head on our laps. I love him so much and having him here was awesome and I can't wait until he's here again for another visit. Anyone who thinks dogs don't think and understand and feel as deeply as we do has clearly never really known a dog.

To shift from the saddest moment to the very best moment that happened during this holiday...my four-year old niece and I were sitting together in my library on Christmas Eve, just hanging out and chatting, and out of the blue, she told me, "Auntie Lesley, I love you more than mac and cheese ~ that's my favorite food ~ and I love you more than Christmas." Those words meant more to me than she will ever know.

Maddy used to love sleeping in the sun
under the tree in the foyer,
so we recreated that scene

had this in the family room last year,
but we put it in the entryway because
I like it in the center of the house
rather than in a corner

the house felt whole again

missing Ginny

he was so sad

I love him like he's my own

he offered silent comfort and support all week

indescribably great to have a dog
hanging out on the couch again

be still my heart

Kaz hanging out in the kitchen to immediately
gobble up any food dropped on the floor

such a gentle giant

exhausted by all the activity

this is C's mom's recipe for smartie cookies,
which my niece renamed smarty pants cookies;
the kitchen was a disaster,
but the memories are priceless

despite the lack of standardization in terms of
the number of smarties on each cookie,
they were delicious

my niece helped set the table...

and made place cards for everyone

my brother wrapped my gift in this

so clever!

colored lights make me so happy

one of Max's favorite spots is the
landing on the stairs and I thought
he looked so cute here,
sleeping in the glow of the lights

Happy Tails to you!

Good Riddance, Fall

Today is the first day of winter, which is my favorite season of the year! I love snow and cold weather, and while both are in very short supply where I live, I still love winter so much! Today also marks the end of fall, and I'm glad to see it go because for me it was awful. Just the worst. This school year has been really rough, we lost Ginny, my grandma passed away...I've felt like I couldn't come up for air for months. I had one goal and that was to make it to winter break, so I breathed an enormous sigh of relief when it finally arrived.

I didn't write a "Life Lately" post in November because there really wasn't much to share that I hadn't already and I was in a serious funk anyway. The only time I felt happy was when we traveled to Seattle and to Lisbon, and while that could be attributed to the travel itself, it was actually about something much bigger. When we travel, it's just the two of us. So traveling felt normal. At all other times, Ginny's absence is deafening - running errands, eating dinner, going to bed - constant reminders that Ginny is no longer with us. Nothing feels normal.

So other than what I'd already written about in November, I honestly didn't have much to say. We gave most of our dog things to family and friends so that other dogs can put them to use instead of them just gathering dust at our house, which was a sad but also cathartic process. The house feels so bizarre with no dogs in it and I'm not sure I will ever grow accustomed to the emptiness. C's parents were here for a visit a few weeks ago and they commented on how quiet the house is now - no cacophony of barking to greet them when they arrived. I miss the craziness that always defined our house.

In addition to a very noticeable lack of dog begs and blankets all over the house, we put our bed back together. Since 2009, we’ve had our box spring and mattress on the floor to accommodate the short legs and fragile spines of our little gals. Our bed frame sat in the basement for all of those years and we didn't really give it much thought over the years. But once Ginny passed away and we no longer had to concern ourselves with the height of our bed, we decided to put it back together. That might not seem like a big deal, but it is a daily reminder that there are no longer any Dachshunds sleeping beside us each night.

no bed frame for 12+ years

our bed is back together now

I’ve made a point of being around friends and that has been so good for my spirits because they make me laugh and have kindly tolerated my less-than-great attitude over the past couple of months. I love them for sticking with me when I am no fun whatsoever - that includes many people who aren't pictured here, who gave me countless hugs and checked in on me frequently. I am beyond lucky to have such love in my life.

We went to two fun things recently - the Van Gogh Experience, which was really cool, and the Christmas celebration at Gaylord National Harbor. We'd been waiting for over eight months to see the Van Gogh Experience and it really did not disappoint, and the Gaylord does a magnificent job of decorating for the holidays, so that was pretty great, too!

33 years since I called this guy and
we spoke for ten hours on the phone!

If I'm being honest, I'm not really in the holiday spirit, but I am hosting Christmas this year and I'm very much looking forward to spending time with family. I'm going to appreciate every second of downtime I have until January 3 is upon us and it will be time to return to school. Until then, I will be wrapped up in a cozy blanket on the couch.

Happy Tails to you!