Where are you from?

"Where are you from?"

We travel quite a bit, and as such, I am asked this on a fairly regular basis.  It makes sense...you're on a tour or waiting at an airport or in an elevator and you start chatting with people and it's one of the first questions they have about you.

It is certainly an innocent question, but I have never felt that I had an easy or straightforward answer to give.

September 1st marked a pretty significant anniversary for me.  I have now lived in America for 20 years.  Two entire decades!  When I first moved here, I felt incredibly out of place.  For as many similarities exist between Canada and the U.S., there are just as many glaring differences, and it was a bit of a culture shock when I first moved here.

All these years later, it is now almost difficult to recall what life was in the Great White North.  While I am a devoted fan of hockey and I cheer passionately for the Toronto Maple Leafs, I honestly feel like an outsider now when I am there.

When I first moved to the States, I was constantly asked, "Are you from Canada?" and when I would respond affirmatively, the reply was some form of, "I knew it, because you SOUND Canadian!"

Over the past dozen years or so, when I have mentioned that I am originally from Canada, I've been more likely to hear, "Really?  Because you don't SOUND Canadian!"

In fact, now when I travel to Canada, or run into other Canadians, I'm usually told, "You must be American, because you just sound SO American."

Frankly, there were times when I did not know what to make of any of these statements...were they compliments or insults?  I'm still not entirely sure!  I will say that sometimes it seems like I don't fit in anywhere.  I'm too Canadian to be an American, but too American to be a Canadian.  It's caused somewhat of an identity crisis at times (for example, when I first moved here and mistakenly wrote "colour" or "cheque" and people would look at me as if I were insane).  Outwardly, I would laugh off these little gaffes, but inside, I was beyond embarrassed.

Still, I liked being able to say I was an immigrant, and at one point, I combined the two words and was telling people I was "Americanadian," but that just invited further inquiries.  And all the explaining was sometimes just too much!  

In addition to my anniversary of living in America, another important milestone was reached a few weeks ago:  I have now lived in my current town for longer than I have ever lived anywhere in the course of my entire life!  I lived in my hometown in Canada until a few days past my thirteenth birthday, and I have now lived in my current town for a smidge longer than that.

So now when people ask where I'm from, what do I say?  You know how on Facebook some people set their relationship status to "It's Complicated"?  That certainly seems apropos!

Perhaps I should be as specific yet nondescript as researchers are forced to be, and respond, "I currently reside in a suburb of a metropolitan area in the mid-Atlantic region of the United States."

The reality is that one is my country of birth and one is my country of choice.  Each is wonderful in its own way and I am fortunate to be able to say that who I am has been shaped by my experiences in both nations.  The day I became an American citizen was one of the most proud moments in my life and it some ways legitimized my place here.  But there is still a large chunk of my story tied to my homeland and I am very proud of that as well - and I will always cheer for Team Canada when it comes to hockey!

So even though I have a less-than-straightforward answer to the question at hand, I'm not convinced I would rather be a girl who has lived in the same town her entire life.  I suspect I would grow bored, as my wanderlust is overwhelming at times, but that would certainly make conversation easier.

The next time someone asks where I'm from, maybe I'll just say my favorite address of all time:  17 Cherry Tree Lane.

Happy Tails to you!